Welcome back to White Rose of Avalon, my Darlings. For this week’s Siren Saturday, I have decided to share another entry in my Incarnated Mermaid Diaries series. Today’s topic is Listening to the Heartbeat of Intuition!
One of the most profound things we can do when it comes to building intuition and discernment is to listen to our hearts. That is what I mean when I say listen to the heartbeat of intuition. For Incarnated Mermaids, or at least for me, it is very easy to tune into the heart and hear what the inner wisdom wants to share. However, that was not always the case. While it is the most natural thing in the world for me to connect with my heartspace, being raised as a human, I had to overcome this idea of putting up a brave facade.
In modern Western society, we are taught that showing negative emotions, other than anger, is a weakness. While this is much more dominantly an ideal placed on men, it is also placed on women. For if women show their fear, anxiety, or even worse, tears, they are labeled as just an overly emotional, or even hysterical, woman. You are fitting into a stereotype of a woman who cannot be trusted to look after herself because she is ‘too emotional.’ How wild is that concept? How can someone be too emotional? Is it not a gift to be able to express your emotions? Is it not a display of emotional maturity to be able to give a voice to what you feel within?
The above were questions I struggled with in middle school and high school when I always felt that letting people see me cry would be to show more vulnerability than I wanted to share. I feared not being taken seriously, or being accused of being less than, of being too emotional to function. So, the only people I let see me cry for those years were people I trusted implicitly: my mother and my closest friends, and sometimes my father. Incidentally, this coincided with the time in my life when I was struggling to keep my psychic abilities at bay, when I tried to push away my gifts for fear of being labeled as crazy. So, now as an adult, I see clearly that these things were intertwined.
My deep connection to my heart, my deeply felt emotions, and my psychic abilities were all intrinsic parts of myself that could be judged by others. And, boy, did I fear that judgement. I should also note that this time in my life is also when I saw that sort of mean girl behavior in myself, which I was not proud of, and which was built on fear and insecurity. All of this is entwined with this fear of being seen as crazy, of being ostracized. I can see how not wanting to show vulnerability and being mean to others align. While this was not my inner truth, it was how bottling my inner truth up was expressed. Yet, as I got older, I began to unpack those emotions and discover just why I feared expressing them.
I also began to embrace my psychic gifts and practice my innate magick. That was when things began to fall into place. As the fear of being judged and even ostracized fell away, I could be my true self and show the true depth of love and empathy I had always felt. That is where the path that led me to finding my Soul origins began. Now, I look back and wonder how I was able to push away all that I was. I wonder how I could craft a facade to protect myself. I wonder if it was ever believed. At the end of the day, I am so glad that I no longer fear listening to my heart. I am blessed to have overcome that debilitating fear of being thought crazy or hysterical. I can now see the true beauty and power of expressing emotions and showing vulnerability!
I hope you have enjoyed this look at how listening to the heart is something that is natural for me as an Incarnated Mermaid, and how I stopped denying this after high school. Do you fear showing your emotions? Let me know your thoughts in the comments below!
Note on Image: The image at the top of the post is an Incarnated Mermaid Diaries Title Artwork that I created using the Waterhouse painting Hylas and the Nymphs. I found the painting on https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/a/a2/Waterhouse_Hylas_and_the_Nymphs_Manchester_Art_Gallery_1896.15_n2.jpg.
LINK TO AVALONIAN ROSE FAERY MYSTERIES PATREON: patreon.com/AvalonianRoseFaeryMysteries
3 responses to “The Incarnated Mermaid Diaries: Listening to the Heartbeat of Intuition”
Maranda, this entry resonated with me on such a deep level. Thank you for sharing this raw and honest look into your journey. The way you connected the suppression of emotions with the suppression of psychic gifts is so powerful—it makes perfect sense that when we silence our heart’s voice, we silence everything else that comes with it.
To answer your question: yes, I absolutely still struggle with the fear of showing emotions. That “brave facade” you described is so familiar. Even now, I catch myself apologizing for tearing up or laughing off anxiety as if it’s nothing, because that old conditioning of “being too much” creeps back in. But reading your story reminds me that vulnerability isn’t weakness—it’s actually the bravest thing we can offer the world. It’s the truest expression of who we are.
I love that you framed emotional expression as emotional maturity rather than a flaw. We need more voices like yours reframing that narrative. And the fact that you can now look back and see the “mean girl” behavior as fear-based insecurity rather than your inner truth shows just how far you’ve come. That kind of self-awareness is rare and beautiful.
Your journey from hiding to fully embracing your mermaid soul is inspiring. Thank you for being vulnerable enough to write this—it gives the rest of us permission to start unpacking our own facades too. 💜🧜♀️
Thank you so much for your kind words. It means more to me than I can express to know that my writing is helping others in such profound ways! It certainly does take a level of emotional maturity to truly see the power of vulnerability. I wish you luck on your journey of working through your fears of showing emotions! As always, thanks for reading and commenting.
🌹🤝